Beauty, grace, and love. These are the words that come to mind when I think of my Grandma. She was never without her perfect hair, makeup, lipstick, nail polish or perfume. She was physically stunning. She always walked with dignity and was given the respect that she deserved.
Over the past 83 years she was an amazing daughter, sister, sister-in-law, wife, aunt, mother, foster mother, mother-in-law, friend, grandma and great-grandma. All the stories people have shared over the last little bit have had the theme of her unselfishness and her love for others. We are here to mourn our loss but we need to take the time to reflect and celebrate the life she lived.
There are many Lessons that my Grandma taught us:
First of all she has taught us to
1) Love our spouse through thick and thin- She and Grandpa have a love that is almost unheard of. They have been married 65 years and still look just as proud of each other in the pictures taken this year as the black and white pictures taken September 6, 1944 when they married in Florida while Grandpa was on leave from the navy. We have been given an amazing example of how marriage and love is supposed to be, completely sacrificial, they have been patient with one another, have been more than kind to each other, and they have stood the test of time.
Secondly she has taught us all to
2) Tell people how we feel. If God had taken her quickly, we still would have known how she felt about each of us. She always said exactly how she felt. We knew when she was proud of us and we knew when she was disappointed with a decision we made. When we would ask for advice on situations, she would tell us what the right thing to do was but she would allow us to make our own decisions and would love us through the wrong decisions and never say “I told you so.”
Grandma had many quotes. First of all She would always say,
3) “If I don’t ask, I don’t know anything.” She always called to just chat with people. You may have thought she was being nosy or something like that. She was staying connected with you and was connecting others to you. If something happened in Tennessee, Wisconsin, Arizona, Indiana or Michigan she always seemed to be the first person to know and the one to tell everyone so we were all in the loop. She also was the keeper of many secrets. She knew we all trusted her and she knew when something had to stay between you and her.
Also one of her favorite quotes or way to live was believing that
4) “If we don’t have family and friends, what do we have” She made sure we always got together when people were in town. She never missed a party, a get-together, a round of hand and foot, a game of pee-nuckle, a birthday girls dinner or a just a casual lunch if she could help it. She made people and relationships her top priority. Also, when she knew two of us were bickering she worked her way into the situation and helped build a bridge between the people to make the relationship better than it was before.
One thing my sister and I both can quote her on is:
5) “Someday your sister will be your best friend!” Okay this quote was one thing that I hated hearing when I was 12 and my little sister was completely annoying. At the time Both Annie and I were always like, “Ya right grandma, I will never be friends with her!!” But low and behold, now we talk at least once every day and know everything about each other. So of course Grandma knew what she was talking about. She and Aunt Ellen had a sister bond that was great to watch. They seemed so opposite but were so perfect for each other. The pictures alone show that bond and how it was like nothing else. She loved Aunt Ellen so much that she and Grandpa went everyday to visit at the nursing home for the 6 years Aunt Ellen was there. She honored her sister and I hope I can live up to her examples.
Another thing Grandma would say all the time was
6) “You can’t take it with you” I believe she meant this not only about her money but also her love. She was always helping people out. Sending money to the charities that sent requests, she would randomly bring a bag of groceries to my apartment while I was in college, slip a $20 bill in my hand for gas, buy dresses for my girls. These were small things compared to the love she spread through helping 2 foster children and many people with countless needs. She has offered a listening ear, a loan, a meal, a bed to sleep in, a job, a cup of coffee, a ride, or just simply a hug to any one who needed it.
My favorite thing to hear her say was
7) “We don’t have any other plans” She and Grandpa were always willing to go anywhere, and do anything. Grandpa and Grandma were able to join my husband and I on vacations to Alabama and Florida. They went to Europe with my aunt and uncle. I know they have had many other vacations, and vacations weren’t the only times they said, “We don’t have any other plans.” I have heard this when I have called and asked if I could stop for a cup of coffee before I drove home from working a 3rd shift, or to see if they wanted to meet for lunch, do some Costco shopping, or if I wanted to bring the girls over to play. Grandma and Grandpa never made excuses that the house wasn’t clean or the laundry wasn’t done, or they wanted to stay home, they just went with it. I love that about them! .
So as we adjust to living in this world without her, we all need to remember her smile, her comments, and the lessons she taught us.
1) always tell people how you feel
2) keep your family and friends close no matter how much work it takes
3) love unconditionally, reach out to those who may or may not ask for your help and live each moment like it is your last.
My grandma was very special to me. She was a friend, a confident, a support, a travel buddy, a shopping partner, a psychologist, and a babysitter. All in all, she was amazing and I will celebrate her life by letting her lessons and love live through me.
Tree hugger!!
Could not get any great pics of the girls in front of the fireplace bc of Ms. Attitude on the right and Goofypants on the left! They make me smile all the time-- no need to be stressed about no great pics, they will care when they see what is up at their high school graduation party ;)
